We never go out on New Year's Eve. Cabs are impossible to get. People drink too much and feel it entitles them to slobber all over you. Midnight is way too late for old folks like us. So we're staying in. Practicing moderation. Probably go to bed at nine. But as an early present to my bleaders, I've compiled a list of celebrations you might want to take in on the flat screen or on your iPhone. Here's the lineup. You're welcome. CNN : The whitest man in America, Anderson Cooper, still can't get a date, so he's once again teaming up with Kathy Griffin (is she or isn't she a tranny?) to ring in the New Year from Planet Hollywood in Vegas. Look for Anderbum to bring his mom. Interest factor: -10) NBC : The usually funny NBC is settling for Carson Daly who will host from Times Square with Jay-Z and Rihanna. Green Day will also perform. At least the music will be funny. (+8) ABC: The fossil is back. Dick Clark will be gumming his way throug...
More than a million served!