Skip to main content

Kate Middleton: Wave your hand on the balcony not your assets




According to today's Globe and Mail, the Royal Family is suing the French magazine Closer and trying to get an injunction to stop the resale of topless images of Kate Middleton.
All weekend, the press releases were flying: threatening, cajoling, pleading with the French to stop the madness of showing the Royal Teets.
Closer's response? Vee fart in your general direction.
Ah hem.
Okay, it's time for a reality check.
If the Palace doesn't want Kate getting photographed for striking the pose, perhaps Kate should consider not striking the pose within eyeshot of a public road.
It's not like she's an ingenue who doesn't know any better.
Kate Middleton lobbied for the job of the future Queen of England. She wasn't Princess Diana, an 18-year-old child. She was nearly thirty before she took on the job.
She should know better, and so should her sister Pippa.
I don't know about you, but I rarely have been seen parading about topless or nude for that matter. UV rays have never touched the skin from my shoulder blade to my belly button. Well, there was that time in Negril, but again, I was barely out of high school and I was suntanning on a nude beach.
And I was not in line to be the Queen of England.
Like most young rich and famous people, the Royals like to take their tops and knickers off on yachts and balconies and show the birds and the bees their blessed equipment. Usually, there are other yachts around when they're mamms up. And, as Closer's management suggested, her Royal Teets could be seen from a public road.
Look, I'm not excusing the paps who are the scum on which flies feed.
But it's not like the Royals don't know they're around every corner.
Word, Kate.
Let them fly in the privacy of your boudoir.
Wave your hand on a balcony not the family assets.
 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Ashley Simpson: Don't Let Her Die in Vain

  Six years ago, I was combing through my Facebook and I saw post from my cousin Julie Major. Her brother and his wife were frantically looking for their daughter Ashley who just days before had Facetimed her mom saying she was planning to return to her home in Niagara. Ashley never made it home. She was murdered in cold blood in her home in Salmon Arm then buried in a nearby field. It would be five and a half years before her body was located, and her boyfriend was charged with second degree murder.  Today, Ashley's urn has a sacred spot in her parents' home, and Derek Favell is in jail awaiting trial by judge and jury. The trial is expected to go into next year sometime. This has been an agonizing journey for Ashley's friends and family. The pain has never stopped, and the wounds are broken open every time the family has to sit through a series of pre-trial proceedings. Fortunately, this ordeal will end but the pain will never wane for the people, including me, who have b...

Ashley Simpson: A Father Remembers

I have asked Ashley Simpson's family and friends to give us a glimpse into the life she lived before going missing nearly a month ago. Here is how her father John remembers his sweet girl. Ashley was a treat when she came into this world, a smashing 9lbs 8 ounces with a  head full of hair and nails that needed to be clipped. She has made many friends in her journey of life and continues to make them as we speak. She has made this world a better place by her love of mankind and this place we call Earth; unfortunately this life she has lived hasn't been the best for her. She has suffered through unbearable pain and suffering through her menstrual cycles. She has cysts on her ovaries that make those 10 days a living hell. She had one of her ovaries removed when she was just 14; the other they won't take out till she is 40 or older. Years of hell for my Ashley. I so feel her pain every month but she doesn't quit, doesn't give in.   That'...

What Bell isn't telling you about Fibe TV

Update: This week, we switched back to Rogers after spending far too long using Bell's crappy television service. For those with Bell, read and weep. For those considering Bell, think twice even if you hate Rogers. RS I've always been an early technology adapter. I had a Betamax. That tells you everything (if you're over 50 at least). My first computer was a "Portable". It weighed 40 pounds and I had to lug it around town on a gurney. I've been through probably 15 computers in my lifetime. Apple is the best. It's also too expensive so I have a piece of shit HP, the one I'm writing this blog on. I've had cable, internet and now Netflix. American Netflix . That's how far ahead of the curve I am. I get all the newspapers for free. How? I disabled my cookies so they can't track me when I'm on the newspaper sites. Even the New York Times hasn't cottoned on to that trick. Hahaha. That will be a fifty buck consulting fee. Bein...