On April 26, 2016, my cousin Ashley Marie Simpson disappeared from her home in Salmon Arm, B.C. after having a fight with her boyfriend, Derek Favell. It's hard to believe it has been four years.
Her body has never been found, and no one has been arrested in connection with her disappearance save -- I cannot believe I'm writing this -- a number of people who have tried to use her I.D. to get credit cards.
I spoke with her mom and dad today, and they still have no clue what happened to her. Cindy and John both believe she is dead, but they have no body to bury. The police have no suspects.
"We still have plans for a memorial," says John, wiping away tears. "I'm hoping to go to work and have the funds."
He's also planning an annual barbecue and golf tournament hoping the COVID-19 virus will dissipate and people can once again congregate to honour Ashley. In the meantime, John and Cindy continue to work on the ships in the Great Lakes trying to keep it together for their burgeoning family. Since Ashley's disappearance, there have been happy times, the births of grandchildren and great grandchildren, and gatherings at the couple's Niagara-on-the-Lake farm. But their thoughts always come back to Ashley.
"It's been four years and I wonder how people who do things like this sleep or have any kind of life," says Cindy, who is planning to celebrate Easter today with John after spending the long weekend on a ship. "My wish for anyone that hurts or takes a life is that they have nightmares for the rest of their life.
"It's been a very long, hard, and emotional four years for everyone."
It's been hard for John to receive calls from banks after people keep using her identification.
"It's ongoing, it doesn't seem to stop. It's very disheartening that people will sink that low to just add more pain and grief to an already sad situation, Rose. It really gets to me."
John takes solace from the terrific support he's received from the community, and from Wings of Mercy, a non-profit which provides drone support for people looking for their missing loved ones.
The group was set up after Ashley's disappearance by Shane Michaels and has grown to more than 3,000 members. Its volunteers provide expertise for families after official search parties go home.
"The numbers are growing," says Shane who sent me a map of British Columbia that shows where people have gone missing in that province alone. The map is littered with cases and cold cases that have yet to be solved.
It's a sad legacy for that province, and law enforcement.
I can't help but feel anger for Ashley's family, her friends, and for all the missing women and girls who meet such a sad and violent end.
My hope is that someday we will all wake up to what has become an epidemic in this country.
I keep praying for resolution for Ashley's family.
But we are tough.
And John says, against all odds, we never give up.
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