There we were, minding our own business, eating granola when this came on television.
You see that right. It's the middle aged Kelly Rippa twerking an 80-year-old on national television.
At 9 a.m.
It was all part of the Hallowe'en show on Live with Kelly and Michael, a program that is watched mainly by geriatrics and shut-ins. Kelly was pretending to be 21-year-old Miley Cyrus and started the routine with a little kitty costume, then she took it all off, leaving absolutely nothing to the imagination.
We saw clips from Miley wearing a similar suit, rubbing up against Robin Thicke.
True, Kelly managed to keep her buttocks far away the gas pump of Art Moore, the creepy, undead Live producer. But she had no shame in thrusting her pelvis toward the audience.
The difference between this performance and the one put on by Miley at a music award show was that Miley's panties were snug-fitting while Kelly offered up several angles of her own ladyparts.
Beavers around the world took to their lodges in embarrassment.
Question: Does that show have a stylist?
As the segment was pre-taped did no one say "ah Kelly, your pelt is showing? Quick get some duct tape."
Michael Gelman, you've got some 'splainin' to do.