Sunday, 8 April 2012

Mike Wallace: Curmudgeon in black shoe polish

These days, they call Anderson Cooper a "veteran" newsman.
He was born when Mike Wallace was 50.
Wallace and his buddies over at 60 Minutes invented the term "veteran".
They were born before people had radios in the house. They invented television.
And now it seems, alas, Myron Wallace has shuffled off the mortal coil. Along with his buds Don Hewitt and Andy Rooney.
'Bout time.
They were on television so long, they started to smell bad.
Morley Safer's still alive and on television, unless Walt Disney did, in fact, perfect cryogenetics. He shouldn't be. He creeps me out.
It's like watching Tales from the Crypt.
I liked Mike Wallace best of all the old curmudgeons because he scared the shit out of every Master of the Universe on his way down. The mere fact Mike Wallace was calling probably sent most folks into cardiac arrest.
He wasn't perfect. He paid for stories. He misled. He entertained.
He smoked.
But Mike Wallace was a helluva performer. The Great Illustionist in Black Shoe Polish.
He wasn't exactly Walter Cronkite, but he was right up there with the best.
Rest in piece, Mike.
And don't get any ideas.
God has call display.

1 comment:

  1. Great column Rose! God has call display. Too funny!