Friday, 23 December 2011

Merry Christmas: We're screwed!

What a weird Christmas this is turning out to be.
I haven't started my Christmas shopping yet.
There will be no presents under the tree come Christmas Day.
None. Nunca. Nada.
That's because we were expecting a big cheque from one of our government clients weeks ago and it hasn't come yet.
It was promised.
You'll get it before Christmas, no problemo.
But the government lies.
So we had to take out a short term loan just to pay our massive Hydro bill.
Presents? Fagetaboutit.
Smartly, Scott went out and bought the fixings for Christmas dinner a few weeks back.
That's because we don't trust the government to make good on its promise.
Fortunately, Scott got paid this week -- a whopping $500 from his car sales business.
His boss is a multimillionaire, but instead of giving the plebes Christmas bonuses, he's making them work six days a week all month for no extra money.
The $500 "draw" will at least pay for Christmas eve dinner, put some gas in the car and buy pet food.
Let's hope one of the dogs doesn't swallow an ornament.
Sorry pal, no vet visit for you. Hmm, you're looking mighty tasty down there.
Unless the big cheque arrives next week, we'll be eating leftovers and lentil soup until the New Year, when our ship will finally come in.
In January, we're getting paid from three sources!
The lead up for Christmas has been just horrible. My home phone died so I had to spring for a new one. Then my desktop computer died. Then my back up computer died.
I can't afford to replace them, so I'm relying on my laptop to do my work. Which means that I had to buy Word Student and Home Office at a cost of $160.
Chicken and egg, don't you know.
Must have software to do work to pay for software.
I had to borrow the money from Stef to buy Office. I had to ask Marissa for some editing software to edit my magazine pages.
How broke are we?
If Shyla has the baby this week, we're going to have to circle the hospital because we can't afford to pay for parking.
That's how broke.
All because Canada Post lost our freaking paper work for our contract a month ago. Then the client lost the invoices. Then they asked us to reinvoice four times under various names. Then the assorted finance people got confused because the invoices were in various names asked for by the client.
Ya gotta love working on contract for the government!
Now all the beetles have gone home for Christmas holidays.
Won't be back until January.
Skiing at Tremblant.
Meanwhile, we're living on fumes.
And lentil soup.
I'm not saying all of this for you to feel sorry for me.
A lot of people have it worse than us.
The only people who seem to have money this year are the folks who own Money Mart.
I'm glad the kids are grown up because we won't have to explain why there are no presents under the tree. We won't have to go to Toy Mountain or the Food Bank.
But yesterday, I got feeling pretty blue.
So here's a song which reflects my Christmas spirit.

Ho ho ho.

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