Tuesday, 27 December 2011

Lisa LaFlamme's inner Oprah

After an exhausting week of lame Christmas specials, starring Canadian ex-pats, I was in the mood for some fresh meat, so I turned on CTV's Interview with the Prime Minister last night.

I wanted to see Lisa the Fan Dancer's interviewing skills.

Was she up for the challenge?

I was impressed that Lisa decided to fly without a net risking the interview without one of the CTV pit bulls, Ginger, maybe Bob Fife, to ask the toughies.

Would she ask any hard questions?

I'm afraid to say, I was disappointed.

Mr. Dressup could have asked better questions.

Lisa came off as a rank amateur, the B-movie equivalent of Katie Couric, all doe eyed and lips all a shimmer, cocking her head and smiling like the cat who caught the rat.

Unfortunately, her cat proved to be toothless and she let the rat gnaw on her tail.

Maybe it was Barbara Walters she was trying out.

If you could be a tree, what tree would you be?

Or Oprah.

When did the abuse stop, Stephen?

She wasn't even as good as that. She blorged on about what a great guy Steve was to give Jackie Boy Layton a state funeral.

Like he had a choice.

Then she spent a half hour talking to Steve and Laureen about their relationship, how the kids deal, what they do on a date.

What date
? asked Laureen.

What's our relationship like? He's always right.

And there's the snap. Ouch!

Steva left it to Laureen to answer the toughie relationship questions cause the man doesn't know what a relationship is.

What are they like as a couple? He's downtown Toronna, she's rural Alberta.

Wait. Hasn't he been passing himself off as an Albertan all these years?

Liar, liar, pants on fire.

What do the kids think about being 24 Sussex rats? They're just normal kids.

Lobotomized in the basement. Hauled out for photo ops.

Yep. Normal kids.

But Lisa failed to ask one hard question. There have been rumors going around for months about marital discord between the First Couple. Why didn't she ask the couple to clear up the rumors?

Or do it slyly.

Word association. Mountie. Chateau Laurier. Birkenstocks.

Barbara Walters would have done that.

Lisa got a D- on the political questions.

In television journalism, they teach about the next question. It's like a game of tennis. You set them up with a lob, then go in for the smash.

She didn't do this at all. Lisa just kept to the script.

I was outraged when she let him get away with a pat answer on the dire state of affairs at Attawapiskat. Bob Fife or Ginger would have taken off on his sorry ass, pressing him to admit the government dropped the ball.

Instead, Lisa let Harper drone on about the need for more meetings.

She had a hour but I guess she was more concerned with saving time to ask about what rock bands Steve invited to the house.

The interview, really, looked like a big Tory advertisement.

It was pithy and frothy.

And Lisa LaFlamme looked like she belonged back at the Kitchener affiliate doing the afternoon style show.

Made me think CTV might as well have had Marilyn Denis do the interview.

Here's hoping Lisa will get better.

Grow a pair.

Embrace her inner Mike Wallace instead of her inner Oprah.

She couldn't have been worse.

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